Confessions of a Mixed Girl pt 2

"Love Knows No Color "

I've never been one to single out any race, because race has never mattered to me but I've always been one whose been singled out because of race. For those who may have not read my last entry, I am mixed with African American and Caucasian. My father is black and my mother is white. Yes I know the correct term isn't black and white but it's just what I'm used to. In my opinion I believe that being mixed is one of the biggest struggles out here and I'm sure every multiracial person battles this. 

For me, I grew up listening to tons of of racist jokes, being called nicknames that coincide with being black, being called a nigger all the time by a cousin, and being singled out because my skin was colored. I've listened to a family member talk about black people and then hurry up and stop because they remember they have a black family member within their presence. I still have family members until this very day that don't like black people and have it instilled in their mind that only blacks are on assistance and collecting money from the government.

 To white people I was so black" and to black people I was so white ! To one side if I did something or talked a certain way I was considered ghetto, and if something happened on the other it was "oh that's that white people crap ". Can you imagine growing up wishing you were white, just so one part of your family could accept you ? That was me, but I've learned to embrace my race ! So with that being said nothing gets under my skin more than people mixed with black who talk down on their own race just to "fit in". It's one thing to joke from time to time, but to belittle your race , instead of embracing it is sad on your part. My sister was one of those same people who lived in the country, and cracked jokes about her race, let people call her all these black nick names, and she talked so preppy just to "fit in" ! She didn't see the wrong in any of it, until she really stopped and thought about it. Just like every white person is not trailer trash,  not every black person steals, drinks kool-aid, collects welfare and is a bad person ! 

So please embrace your race and remember

 "Be yourself, Be Unique, & Be Beautiful" 

Confessions of a Mixed Girl

Ahh ! Look at those Long, Luscious and Beautiful Curls. Those my friends are the curls of a mixed girl, mainly those who are mixed with half African American + Caucasian or Spanish.  Hair is one of the many struggles a mixed girl has, but today's topic is hair.  I'm half African American, half Caucasian and speaking for myself and I'm sure many others, I've battled with my hair since I was a child. Growing up I hated it. I remember hiding the comb and paddle brush from my mother so she couldn't brush out my hair. There were times when I avoided getting my hair brushed out for so long,  that it got to a point where I would have huge clumps of matted hair.  I was forced to do nothing but sit on the floor between my mothers legs, as tears rolled down my face from the pain of her trying to brush them out. The only good thing that came out of that was the long nap I got out of it after.

By the time I was teenager, I started taking care of my own hair. All those years my mother was my "hair dresser" and somehow, I woke up one day and decided to be my own. My hair became the most frustrating thing in my life and I had no idea how to properly care for it. It was so thick, and curly and never cooperated so I  always wore it in a pony tail caked with hair grease, gel and loads of conditioner until I was able to get my own hair straightener.  I wanted my curls and thick hair gone and tried both perms & relaxers , the only thing I got from it was damaged hair . It wasn't until last year that I vowed to accept that my hair is different from others, and to take care of the curly hair I was blessed with. 

I've learned to accept that 

• No matter how many times I brush out my hair it will tangle right back up
• My hair dries extremely fast and needs to be brushed out either in/or right after I get out the shower
• My hair and scalp have to be moisturized 
• My hair can't be cut wet ! 
• Not every hair stylist knows how to do ethnic hair 

With that being said, here is what I use to take care & maintain my hair.

Products I recommend 

1. Coconut Oil: Coconut oil is an amazing hair moisturizer. The oil melts as soon as it touches your hand, it wont make your hair feel any thicker than it already is .  Coconut oil has many more benefits which can be found here. 

2. Aphogee Hair Care Products : I swear by this brand ! Their products are amazing and do exactly what they claim. In summer of 2011, I attempted to bleach my own hair, and my hair was so weak, stretchy, and kept breaking off. I started using the Two Step Protein Treatment which stops hair breakage, and helps to rebuild hair structure for six weeks. This treatment is best for anyone who has dyed, permed or relaxed their hair before. If you buy the Two step treatment, you HAVE to buy the balancing moisturizer ! I will post my before and after hair length results, this Friday . The shampoo is not necessary to have neither is the Leave in Conditioner, but they both work great.

3. Biotin:  Biotin is good for anyone who is looking to have healthy hair. Not only is it great at making your hair healthy, but it's good for your skins and nails as well. This stuff makes your hair super soft, and when your hair and scalp are healthy, your hair grows ! 

4. Mixed Chicks : I haven't actually tried this product yet, but I discovered it while writing this blog entry. I am going to try out these products, and do a review on them . I'm pretty excited about it since I've never seen any hair products marketed towards mixed girls. If anyone wants to see more about this line, click HERE. 

Mixed Girl Spotlight 

Thandie Newton 

“I’m stepping outside the mould, outside what’s accepted and applauded”. It takes a little courage to do that.

Mainly, I want to wear it natural because it looks amazing! " 

I came across this awesome interview of Thandie Newton who played in films such as For colored girls,Tyler Perrys Good Deeds, Norbit, and Pursuit of Happiness. She talked about her struggle of having mixed hair while growing up in the UK, and why she decided to go all natural. Check out her interview HERE

Thanks for visiting my blog, and remember 

"Be Yourself, Be Unique, Be Beautiful  "

The New Gal

After months of reading tons of blogs and falling in love with the endless opportunities of discussions, I've finally decided to give it a go. I look forward to sharing my thoughts with you all, and I hope that I can inspire many of you with my blog. So please follow me along this journey. 

About Me 

I'm Mar, an Upstate New York girl who has a passion for ...

Fashion:  I  ♥ shopping and looking my best for less ($$) Thrift shopping is my favorite ! 

 Fitness: My motto: You are what you eat, and what you eat affects how you feel.  

Family: My biggest support system and motivation

 Christ: Without him I'd be nothing.   

Creating: I love being able to bring my visions to life, and having others ♥ my items just as much I do. 

My Inspiration 
Last year I gave birth to this beautiful, wild, and crazy child ♥ Little did I know, my life would never be the same after having her. From the moment I held her in my arms, I experienced something that no one could take away from me, the real feeling of L O V E ! You know that indescribable,  heart warming, unbelievable, hard to process kind of love? Who knew someone so small could fill a heart so big ? My daughter is my everything and she's the reason why I decided to start my business. When my 6 weeks of maternity leave were up, I thought I could handle being away from my daughter but I had a bad case of separation anxiety. 6 weeks just wasn't enough time for me to gear up to be a mother. I decided to follow my heart so that I could watch my daughter grow. Besides, answering phone calls and being yelled at for faulty alarm systems just wasn't my ideal job . Being unemployed wasn't easy and I felt extremely guilty for putting so much pressure on my boyfriend, so I started thinking of a plan. I've always been a creative person and I've always had dreams of becoming a designer of some sort so I put my talents to use. 

I'm now the creator of Novalie on Etsy.com, thanks to my daughter. So I've now made it my mission to become nothing but the best that I can be in life, so that I can be a positive role model to her, and an inspiration to every other young person in this world that regardless of where your from, you can be anything you want to be. ♥♥♥